Maybe because it is the year of the Tiger or maybe because 2009 was just a rough year and I’m looking for so much more, but I am confident that 2010 will be a good year, my year.  I’ve always believed in living a passionate life and doing things that make me happy but I haven’t fully followed through… which leads me to the things I need to work on to live the life I want to.

Appreciate the journey.

Somewhere along the way between coming out of university and working full-time has really changed the perception I have of myself.  It’s not that I’m not confident about who I am and my abilities to be successful but it’s more of an expectation that I have set hat I have yet to reach.  I am constantly feeling disappointed in myself because I want to get there faster without realizing that it’s just not possible sometimes.

2010 will be more about appreciating the journey to getting where I want to go and ultimately having more patience in the process.  I need to enjoy and learn from the experiences (good or bad) that will lead me to euphoria instead of giving myself a hard time when things don’t go exactly as planned.

Warrior > Worrier.

I worry too much because I care too much.  It’s probably not a bad trait but there is a big discrepancy between really caring and not giving a sh!t.  It’s not much of a problem when someone or something is on the other extreme since I do not spend more than a minute to ponder but if it is something important or I love you, then I’m crazy! lol

Seriously speaking I just need to chill and not let my emotions get the worse of me.  Be a warrior, strong and composed, instead of a worrier, flustered and annoyed.  If I find myself worrying, it’s better to take the initiative to control the situation versus letting the situation affect me.

Enjoy personal space.

Unlike most people, I do not enjoy personal time.  It’s not that I can’t be alone but I enjoy the company of people more than hanging out by myself always.  There’s nothing appealing about kicking back and spending time alone.  Even for something as simple as watching TV shows; I’d much rather watch with someone than not.

It’s not that I need to be glued to people but there is a comfort having someone there; and by there I mean in the house or just around in some way.  And although this hasn’t been much a problem in any way, I know that I need to be okay with it and turn that into time well spent by myself.  I think good things can come from it and I’ll probably be more productive.

2010 for me is about new experiences, new adventures and enjoying the journey in getting where I want to go.  So the challenge here is to find something that t I enjoy doing by myself and be okay that I am doing it alone because there’s no better way to get to know myself and find happiness within than to spend time alone. Will keep you posted!

You are your own rock.

Something was different about 2009. It was a life-changing year, different in every way and went through things that I never thought would come my way.  I am still very indifferent about how I feel about 2009 but in many ways I’m glad it’s over.

What I’ve realized time after time is that at the end of the day, you only have yourself to depend on and that your happiness needs to stem from your core.  If you depend on others for happiness you will be disappointed because that expectation is too much to be rested upon someone else’s shoulders.  It’s also not really fair to put that on anyone else!

Two things to remember that help is 1) accept the reality of the situation and 2) spend time on making things better not waste time moping over what you cannot change.  And so what it all comes down to is that you have to be the master of your life’s goals and overall happiness level.  If you want it, go get it, do it and make it happen.  Do not depend on others to make it happen for you (even though a helping hand is always appreciated).

“Everything is in your hands and your hands only.” @skanwar

I think having control of your own happiness is empowering and nothing and no one should ever come between that. So 2010, are you ready?  Because I’m coming for you!

Last but not least, I’ll share a few things that I’m looking forward to…

• Finding passion and happiness in my 9 to 5 (aka work)
• Skydiving (Summer 2010!)
• More traveling – cruise, NYC, etc.
• Seeing friends get engaged <3
• Boyfriend working in clinic
• DT Volleyball Championships (wooot!)
• Learning a new skill or improving a rusty one
• Planning/help to plan some kind of event
• Volunteering
• Rekindling old friendships
• Having countless girls nights in at best friend’s condo!
• Becoming a better chef
• and so much more!

And taaaaaaa daa, cheers to 2010!  Cheers to better tomorrows and backward smiley faces all around (:

xoxo

C

- Anatole France

Thanks to @DoOneGood for sharing the Finish Strong movie link (www.finishstrongmovie.com) this morning, otherwise I wouldn’t have found this inspirational quote! I’ve even written it out and posted it on my bedroom wall!

Lately I’ve been struggling a bit mentally, thinking about life in all of its aspects.  If you’re thinking about whatever it is you are thinking about, be rest assured that you are not alone.  It’s easy to fall when you’re already downhill (been there, done that – check check check) but what you have to realize is that it always seems worse than what it really is.

Sometimes,  it’s just a mental thing; and today it finally clicked for me.

Stay tuned because the girl who shouts from the rooftops, walks through walls, and dances in the rain is back. (:

- C

We’re always taught to look forward and pay attention  to the road ahead, but note that we are also reminded to check the rear view mirror every 20 seconds.  I definitely check my blind spots way too often then.

Pondering? Let’s continue together.

And yes, I am back…. attempt #3 at writing regularly.

Over the past few days I’ve had the opportunity to meet some incredible people and to say the least, I feel pretty lucky considering that this door opened very unexpectedly.  But maybe sometimes that’s the best part, when you’re caught off guard!

To keep this post short and sweet, what I’m saying is to simply take and make every opportunity something worthwhile.  I’m confident that I made a great impression but whether or not things turn out positively, I sincerely believe that it was definitely still a good experience.  It’s true, I am really drawn to passionate people… and yet again, I’ve been inspired (:

Happy Friday!

The toughest part of any situation is the unknown;  not knowing and not having enough information to make a decision.  When we know things we feel more at ease (good or bad), at least I do anyways. 

At the moment, it’s really hard not to think about the economic downturn and how it might affect myself, family or friends.  Recently, I’ve heard more than a handful of people that I know, who are seriously worried about their (finances and) job security to say the least.  For example, at the company my Mom works for, they are trying to automate a lot of processes that a few employees currently do by hand.  Is this an honest move for the company to become more efficient? Or is this a tactic for them to downsize?  Or maybe both?

Prepare for the Worse and Hope for the Best

Despite all these uncertainties, one thing’s for sure – we can only prepare for the worst and hope for the best”(my boyfriend told me this last night so thought I should share!).  We can either see the glass as half full or half empty – losing a job can be an opportunity to pursue another career, spend more time with kids, go on vacation; but losing a job also means having to find another one, be broke as joke, and live at home!

Either way, with companies cutting jobs like trees around the world – it’s not a pretty sight.

Sorry I’m a little late with this post… but what sparked this topic was actually from a dinner I had with a couple of friends from University a couple weeks back.  One of them mentioned how much things have changed since work started and I think it’s true too.  But then again, with change also comes many countless memories that will make 2008 a year to be missed.

Here are my Top 5:

5. MESA – As much as I’ve moved on from the madness, there is something magical about being involved in this organization that will always be a part of me.  I hope I’ll be lucky enough to experience this type of togetherness in a team sometime in my life again!

4. Freedom of Travelling – Backpacking in Europe (esp with Belle) was an awesome experience.  Mmmm I miss those pastries and sleeping on the grass in front of the Tour Eiffel!  Oh yes, can’t forget about Vegas either; upgrading to a baller suite, watching cirque, clubbing at Palms… and all with awesome friends too! 

3. Having a summer (enough said) - The kicking-it-back lifestyle, aka sleeping in the AMs, waking up in the PMs and doing anything I wanted whenever. 

2. Volleyball 24/7 – Living and breathing volleyball (5x/wk court & beach) & of course Dream Team (:

1. Some awesome friends living in Toronto -  Above all, what I’ll miss most about 2008 is having some of my closest friends in Toronto (Jo, Car, and soon-to-be John) who has left (and will be leaving tomorrow) to pursue once in a lifetime experiences. I miss you all  ): … and know that 2009 won’t be the same without you… ): P.S. Come back soon.

And there we go, goodbye 2008 and cheers to 2009 - a new year with less swearing, more blogging, more savings, more championships, and the same most amazing friends ever.

 

What do my pictures say to you?

On the Left: I see an insecure girl who wakes up every morning thinking, “when will I ever” be able to walk confidently outside without make-up and not care about what people think.  Guys can do it, they call it the “waking up look” but me, like many other girls could never.  Some of you may look at the two pictures and think, “you don’t look that different” but get real people, the picture is taken on my webcam and hence falsifies what I really look like when I wake up in the morning.

Regardless, it’s not that I think I’m really ugly (despite what you may or may not think), it’s become more of a routine than anything else and even more a part of who I am.  Without a mask on, I feel genuinely naked, insecure and scared of what the world has to offer me.  It’s a little dramatic, but that little bit of foundation, eye shadow, eye liner and mascara changes how I feel about myself and my superhero abilities.

Whether this is a result of media or not, I’m not going to blame them for making women “feel like they have to be skinny/have to be pretty”  – I think it’s more of a personal choice.

On the Right:  I am the confident woman staring right back at you, ready to fight crime and scrumbags all over the world.  (:

Every good superhero story has a moral to their story

No matter who you meet or how confident you think someone is, deep down we are all insecure about something (and that’s okay!).  As confident as the cockiest person you know is, they are probably wearing a costume to make them feel capable to face the world too. So the next time you feel insecure, just remember that you can borrow my eye liner anytime! (:

–

If you’re wondering where the inspiration behind this post came from, it was a result of going out for lunch as Clarke Kent with my boyfriend this afternoon.  He tells me I’m beautiful but inside I’m still overly self-conscious without a cape on.

Over the past two years I have struggled to say the least with a dilemma between following my heart or following my head.  No, this is definitely not a love story (eww, haha) but a real one that I’m sure many have contemplated.  Over and over again, I weighed the pros and cons of whether being safe or risky was the better option and though I’ll never know in hindsight whether or not safe was good or bad, I know that taking this risk has been awesometastic!

Who said an accountant wouldn’t/couldn’t make it as a marketer? 

Well you’re wrong and eat your words.  It’s been a long journey of many doubts, hurdles, and insecurities but it’s finally a reality.  I did it, I made it, and (if all goes well, I’ll tell you I’ve conquered it too!)  In fact, having an analytical background brings a great foundation for success in marketing.  I think it’s naive and ignorant to believe that marketing is just a bunch of pretty pictures put together creatively with a quirky slogan – our schools, yes universities that students and parents throw 10,000s of dollars into, are definitely not teaching students what the real deal is.  Thank goodness for student associations, (at least the one I was once President of) who care enough to entertain the notion that marketing is much more.  Actually, it’s a real problem, Richard Boire, CMA Vice-Chair shares his thoughts about this major talent crunch issue (Read more).

Passion above all else speaks in many ways.  For me, declining a full-time offer from an established Big Four accounting firm to pursue an ambiguous career in what I was/am passionate about (marketing) is one of my biggest accomplishments to date.  Looking back, the hardest part was being worried that I would disappoint my parents or not being able to meet expextations that so many friends, professors, and mentors had for me.  And although I will never regret starting where I started and the path that it has led me through, it’s a huge relief now that I have the opportunity to prove to an amazing company (and to myself) that I can.

The V-I-B-E

Everyday we make decisions and sometimes (many times) things go wrong.  But I think if you’re truly passionate about something and are willing to work really hard for it, others will also feel your vibe too!  I know because I’ve been told that my vibe is passion meets bubbly, genuine, and confident.  What’s your vibe?

–

So the next time someone tells you that you can’t do it, think again.  Seriously ask yourself how hard you are willing to fight for what you believe in – whether it be in yourself or in others – because I am a true believer and living proof that you can. It’s really not about making decisions impulsively because you’re “passionate” about something, it is however, about making a plan and committing yourself to smart decisions that will make you successful (i.e. use your brain too!). It also helps so much to surround yourself with supportive people that love you and believe in you (thank you) because without them its easy to be a quitter.

Passion “above all else” maybe a bit over-the-top but you get the jist!

It’s a big world

I’ll admit it.  I do not know my world history, culture, or language.  Flying from country to country, visiting museum to museum, and (barely) speaking Franglais has confirmed that I am not a worldly individual.  There were so many instances where I would stand in front of a statue and wonder to myself, “what am I looking at?” only wishing that I had paid better attention back in highschool. *sigh*  Nevertheless, the culture was intriguing, and the architecture was stunning; things that were more memorable than any fact could ever be.

Tip: When in doubt, get an audio guide.  They cost on average 4-6 euros, but it’ll be worth it if you’re anything like me.

(Not so) Independent woman?

The answer is both.  Externally, I am an independent woman – I don’t need, I want it.  I don’t complain, I do it.  I don’t cry, I get over it.   But what meets the eye is not always true because at the end of the day I am a Type A that needs to be around people 24/7.

It’s not new information, but it became very evident during those three weeks.  It was nice to have someone to talk to all the time, someone to shop with, someone to laugh and share memories with….  I could never do it alone (without a purpose of course).  In fact, I wouldn’t want to as it would bring me no joy to have personal time half way around the world away from everyone I care about.   Ha, I guess you know you are a social butterfly when times like these remind me of quiet res nights when I would sit in Bran’s room (for no reason) while he played poker. lol

Tip:  If you can’t do it alone either just remember to be selective.  Go with someone who you bond with, trust me. (:

If I could it all over again… (shortlisted)

…I would bring a cellphone that worked!  My Blackberry Pearl failed me as I was only able to receive incoming calls and text messages.  Luckily I never got lost and pay phones and Internet access were somewhat readily available to us.

…I would bring more memory for the camera and a transfer cord.  For all those who complained that no pictures were ever uploaded, now you know why!  Belle and I had poor communication prior to packing regarding camera stuff so we only had a 2GB memory card for 3 weeks. lol

…I would plan our trip itinerary and make reservations earlier.  One of our biggest ‘omg’ moments was when we couldn’t use our Eurail Youth Passes to purchase train tickets from Paris to Nice.  And because we thought in advance reservations were not necessary, it costed us an extra $122!  Although it was worth it for Nice’s stony and sandy beaches, and Monte Carlo’s baller visit… it could have been used towards our shopping escapades!

In the end

Every story has an ending but I think this traveling one is far from over.  I don’t know where I’ll visit the next time I have vacation but what’s most interesting is that as I grow older I only realize that there is so much more to see, learn, and experience. (:  It only gets better from here, just wait and see…

–

How about you?  How has your traveling experiences changed you, or what have you learned about yourself that you didn’t know before?

The Magic Fountain

Although not as incredible as the Bellagio fountain in Las Vegas, the Magic Fountain in Plaza Espanya is an amazing centre piece for the city and brings hundreds (maybe even thousands) of tourists and locals together every Thursday to Sunday evening. The fountain is lit with bright colours and entertained by several songs throughout the night. At the background of the fountain is the National Museum of Art which has cascading waterfalls all the way down from the top of the hill. Luckily for us, we arrived in time on Sunday evening to catch the show! But after watching the grand fountain, it was obvious that Toronto seems to lack an attraction so simple but yet so appealing.

All it takes is a large projector screen…

Who knew that watching a movie outdoors on a mountain could be so entertaining! In fact, the experience was amazing and I could only wish that such culture could be brought back to Toronto. In Barcelona,they hold weekly Monday, Wednesday, and Friday screenings of movies on top of Mont Fujic and last night we watched Death Proof with a couple of travellers that we met on the Fat Tire Bike Tour. It was hilarious because the movie was played in English (with Spanish subtitles and we were the only ones laughing during the comedic parts! And although we had to walk up the mountain and back down again, (almost getting lost after the movie) being part of the culture was without a doubt worth every little bit it all!

Beach Bum (even in another country)

The beach here is beautiful and getting a full body massage while tanning for 10 Euros is even better! Not much to say about the beach except that I have gotten so dark that some of you will not recognize me. Belle likes to refer to me as her Indian friend, so be prepared to see a darker but hotter me (haha, I’m kidding)!

Over the past sixteen days of backpacking throughout Europe, I have made quite a few discoveries about myself. In fact, I have tested my tolerance and have learned a lot; both about myself and about different people, cultures, food, and so much more.

Unfortunately, you will have to stay tuned for that in-depth post upon my return to Toronto in a few days!